I have been waiting for this to situation to clear itself up before posting about it, but it appears the smoke has cleared and Richard Donner is moving forward with a sequel to The Goonies with Steven Spielberg, the original producer who also has the story credit from the original film, in hand. According to Corey Feldman via Twitter (sigh), this project is starting to get some legs. For better or worse. This could easily be another, “they are whoring out my childhood” post of which I’ve had a few in the past. I’m not going to go that route, however. Yes, I think this sequel is beyond ill-advised and enough to make me scream. Any fan of the original I would hope feels the same way. Let’s face it, the time for the sequel is past. Do we really want to see an old ass Mikey? I don’t. Corey Feldman is way too burnt out to recapture the beauty of Mouth. I, however, am always up for more Martha Plimpton in any way we can get her.
Goonies cast at the 25th Reunion
The magic of the original film was that it was kids taking charge of their own destiny outside of the adult world to make shit happen. If the sequel were to have happened, it should have happened back in 1987 or 1988 when they could still capitalize on that same feeling. To me, with the Goonies all as adults in the coming sequel (let’s hope it falls apart), it rings pretty hollow. I don’t know the storyline, but I am skeptical at best. Perhaps the thing that is most clear in all of this is how creatively bankrupt Steven Spielberg has become. When was the last original film he did? War Horse, which was a bomb (war pun intended). Hell, Schindler’s List was the last decent movie he made, although the first 20 minutes of Saving Private Ryan were really great. He’s given us one shitty Indiana Jones sequel with another likely shitty one on the way, a Lifetime movie about Abraham Lincoln salvaged only by the dynamite performance of Daniel Day-Lewis, and a handful of mediocrity (A.I. Artificial Intelligence, Catch Me If You Can, The Terminal, Amistad, Jurassic Park: The Lost World). So why wouldn’t he latch onto something that has a rabid audience? And Richard Donner? Four Lethal Weapon films and a series of bombs including 16 Blocks, Assassins and Timeline. Even if Chris Columbus, who has had his ups (Gremlins, Only the Lonely) and downs (mostly as a director – Rent, Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief) comes back to write the script, I just don’t know how the recipe that worked so well is recreated. To me, this is a film that never needed a sequel at all. I know Goonies Never Say Die, but damn it, I wish the powers that be would tell this project to die and go away. I wrote this about the merits of the film and why it still resonates almost 30 thirty years later.
If it does come off, and Sean Astin says he’ll bet his children on the fact that it will, then I will see it. I will pay only a matinee price, though. And I reserve the right to skewer it further upon seeing it. In the off chance it is actually good, I will admit that. I still maintain that no sequel is necessary and the integrity of the original is what Donner, Spielberg, Columbus and any of the original cast that return are all betting with. Seems like a bad bet to me.
It’s hard to believe that Amy Heckerling‘s Fast Times at RidgemontHigh was released 31 years ago (as of last week). Having recently re-watched it, it is a film that, even though it was filmed in 1982, still has an exceedingly large deal of relevance to today’s youth. Without the dramatic edge that John Hughes‘ The Breakfast Club has, Fast Times at Ridgemont High is so infused with humor and jokes that even the serious topics that the movie covers (teen sex, drugs, relationships, abortion) are funny. That’s a pretty hard thing to do. Based on a book by then unknown film guy, Cameron Crowe, who went undercover at a high school in California to get the skinny on what kids at that time were doing, the film version is infinitely better than the book, which is one of the few times I can actually say that (The Player being the only other example I can come up with). This film is the early 80s in a nutshell, and we’re all better for it.
It’s hard to know where to start with this movie because so much of it worthy of mention. The basic synopsis of the film is as such: Kids in Ridgemont are bored, like in most places. They fill their time working shitty jobs, drinking beer, fucking and trying to get through high school. So here are the main players in the film:
Brad Hamilton (Judge Reinhold)
Brad: an all-american guy.
Brad is entering his senior year, has a great girlfriend, Lisa (Amanda Wyss of Better Off Dead fame) “who’s great in bed” but he’s a senior now. He’s a single, successful guy and he’s got to be fair to himself. And he needs his freedom…or so he thinks. When things go down the shitter for him, Lisa ends up dumping him. Turnabout is fair play, I suppose. After losing his job at All-American Burger, and dumping his gig at Captain Hook’s Fish & Chips, he finally finds his niche a Mi-T Mart. Well played, Brad. Shoot for the stars.
Stacy Hamilton (Jennifer Jason Leigh)
I don’t want sex. Anyone can have sex. I want a relationship. I want romance.
Stacy, Brad’s sister, and the de facto center of attention in Fast Times, is a freshman who has been taken under the wing of senior Linda Barrett (Phoebe Cates) and taught the ways to use her wiles to capture men. When this backfires at least twice, she reconsiders her approach. After a tryst with a 26-year old stereo salesman, a failed attempt to bag Mark Rather (Brian Backer), a nerd in her biology class and her subsequent seduction of his best friend, the slimy Mike Damone (Robert Romanus) which gives her an unwanted pregnancy, Stacy decides to cool things off. Probably for the best, young lady. Fortunate are we that director Amy Heckerling and musician Jackson Browne created an anthem, “Somebody’s Baby,” for Stacy to cue us into when she is going to get freaky. My 9-year old self thanks you for this.
Here’s Linda dispensing her sage-like advice for Stacy:
Linda Barrett
Hi Brad. You know how cute I always thought you were…
Adequately described above, Linda coaxes Stacy out of her shell and into womanhood. Linda is confident and beautiful and it’s no wonder Stacy flocks to her. Linda seems to think she has it all figured out – after graduation, she will move to Chicago with her fiancee Doug and they will walk through the world together. Well, that’s not how it works out, of course. Linda is the object of what might well be the most famous scene from any teen movie ever when she appears in Brad’s self-love fantasy (click the above image to see…be forewarned, it is not safe for work). The Cars’ “Moving in Stereo” still triggers memories of this scene to this date for me (and I’m sure many others who saw this film back in the early 80s and beyond) from the first strum of the guitar. Cates is a fine actress and was fun in both Gremlins films as well as Drop Dead Fred. It’s a shame that the most remembered part of her career will be this scene.
Jeff Spicoli (Sean Penn)
Just like I told the guy on ABC…danger is my business!
Spicoli may well be the best character in film history. The guy is a non-stop highlight reel from his first appearance until the final scene of the film. Cameron Crowe, who wrote the film and the book it was based on, really captured something with this character. A surfer who has “been stoend since the third grade”, Spicoli pretty much hijacks the film. His epic back-and-forths with history teacher Mr. Hand (Ray Walston) are the stuff that cinematic dreams are made of. Despite his battles with Mr. Hand, mutual respect is gained on both sides by the end of the film. One of the great mentor-mentee relationships on film. However, their first meeting will ALWAYS be my favorite scene in the movie:
Penn‘s delivery of the “You dick!” line is pitch perfect and it caused so much laughter the first time I saw this with friends (Lindells, surely you remember this?), that we rewound the VHS tape (yes, VHS) about 35 times and laughed equally hard each time. Mind you, this is a future two-time Oscar winner. There are so many clips I could post of him and it would probably never get old to anyone reading this. And of course that he’s drinking a Hamm’s whilst driving at 1:08 in this scene captured my heart. And who could forget his explanation of the American Revolution:
Bless you, Spicoli. Forever and ever, amen.
Mark Ratner
Well, naturally something happens. I mean, you put the vibe out to 30 million chicks, something is gonna happen.
Mark is the nerd who falls in love with Stacy upon first sight but is too chicken to ask her out, which is sort of an m.o. with him as we find out from his friend Damone. When he is finally able to go out with Stacy, he drops the ball when she is clearly ready to take a trip to Freakytown. So when Damone capitalizes on the chance, the two have a falling out (as one might expect). Of course everything is cleared up in the end and Mark, because he’s not a guy just trying to fuck anything that moves gets the girl in the end. Or at least that’s what the epilogue says. Good to see the nice guy finish first for once. Get yours, Rat. Prior to his Judas-like betrayal, Damone, much like Linda to Stacy, dispensed some very valuable advice to Rat. Take a look:
Mike Damone
Damone, lothario of Ridgemont.
Damone is what he is and he can’t help that. A ticket scalper on the side, he plies his trade while doing his best to bed the ladies of Ridgemont. After betraying what appears to be his only friend when he sleeps with and knocks up Stacy, he is a ship with no captain, floating aimlessly, bearing the brunt of Rat’s hatred as well as Stacy and her friends. Why you ask? He skipped out on taking Stacy and paying for her abortion. What a guy, right? That anyone would want to hang out with him is crazy. But fellas, he is your cautionary tale – be like Damone and you will get shit on. A tough role to play and Robert Romanus played it very well. Shame it pretty much torpedoed any career he might have had. It’s pretty hard to overcome playing such a douche. Type-casting anyone?
As I’ve mentioned there are a bevy of first or near first appearances of very famous actors in this film. There’s Nic Cage:
There’s Anthony Edwards of ER fame and Eric Stoltz:
And of course, Forrest Whitaker:
By my count, there are 4 future Oscar winners that were a part of this film – Whitaker (Best Actor – Last King of Scotland), Cage (Best Actor – Leaving Las Vegas), Sean Penn (Best Actor – Mystic River and Milk) as well as Cameron Crowe (Best Original Screenplay – Almost Famous). Not a bad pedigree, eh?
One of the things that I appreciate most about this film is that even though the characters do shitty things (Damone) and try to figure out who they are, they are never judged for it. I specifically mean the treatment of the female characters, in particular Stacy, who is coming into her sexuality and see what fits for her. We never see her called a slut, we never see her put down because she is experimenting sexually. These days, there would have to be a moral of some sort attached or these scenes would be pulled all together. It also seems almost utopian in its treatment of race. Spicoli and Charles Jefferson’s little brother (Stanley Davis, Jr.) are good friends and clearly come from two separate worlds (who didn’t come from a separate world from Spicoli?). Charles Jefferson is worshiped as a God on the football field and met with gasps when he is seen in the community. While this is not a new concept, it’s hard to imagine that if this film took place in Alabama, Louisiana or even in my home state of Indiana at the same time, you would not find near the reverence as we see in this film.
Dazed & Confused,Thirteen and Superbad may be the only other R-rated teen comedies out there, or at least those worth watching. Nonetheless, they are few and far between, which is a shame. It’s hard to capture the essence of the high school experience in PG-13 since few, if anyone’s, experience is really PG-13. Fucking MPAA and their bullshit. Fast Times at Ridgemont High is one of the classic films of the 1980s, continues to endure and bring the laughs as I’m sure it will continue to do so for another 31+ years. While the fashion has certainly gone out of style, the situations depicted in the film have not. And Spicoli never ages, his wisdom never eclipsed.
This past weekend I introduced my two sons, ages 6 and 8, to The Goonies for the first time. This was a pretty big moment for me as it is one of my all-time favorite movies and I wanted them to love it as much as I did when I saw it 28 years ago. It’s no surprise that they did and I had hoped that their love of the movie was for the same reasons that I loved it and still love it. Funny enough, when I queried them about it, here were five of their responses:
1) There was a gun in it and Francis Fratelli got bitten in the junk with Data’s “pinchers of power.”
To explain – my wife and I try to keep exposure to violence and the mechanisms of violence at a minimum so anytime a gun makes an appearance, the boys love it if for nothing other than to piss us off. They learn that trick quite early. And since my sons are boys, anything having to do with private parts is funny. Very funny, in fact. Sadly, this is one thing that doesn’t really change as you get older.
2) Chunk is funny. Data has cool inventions.
Yes he is, although I have been asked to do the Truffle Shuffle more times than I ever hoped to be asked. This is why I was at the gym at 9:30 p.m. last night.
Can’t wait for the crazy ass inventions I come home to while the kids are on summer break. No doubt the bulk of them will be made in some effort to bring pain to my person.
4) The water slide looked fun and they wished they could ride on it.
My youngest refused to ride the water slide at the public pool by himself just yesterday. Sigh.
5) They could use all that treasure to buy all of the stuffed animals, Angry Birds, Just Dance video games and candy they want. Oh, and their own laptops so they watch YouTube videos of Annoying Orange.
Fair enough. Hard to argue with that.
So, not quite what I was hoping, but I have high hopes that their impressions and takeaways from the film will evolve over time. With that said, here are my impressions 28 years later and five reasons why I think this film still endures (with five badass posters to boot):
The Goonies is a movie that you can’t help but to love because it appeals to the very essence of what youth is all about – anything in your wildest dreams is possible. It should be no surprise to anyone when I say I’m not the biggest Steven Spielberg fan. However, his participation in this project is one the few saving graces of his career, in my opinion. It suits him when he taps into his more nostalgic side. His films are more successful in my book when he does this. Take the first three Indiana Jones as a good example (despite George Lucas‘ involvement). The absence of his played-out “father-figure” is one of the films strengths. That it was directed by high-octane action director Richard Donner (first two Christopher ReeveSuperman movies and the entire Lethal Weapon franchise) was an interesting choice, and a successful one, surprisingly. And with Chris Columbus, the man who wrote Gremlins (and would later direct the first two Home Alone and Harry Potter films) writing the script, its pedigree was good to start. So here we go…
5) Kids can get shit done without their pesky ass parents getting in the way
That which cure the ills of the residents of the Goon Docks.
We all remember being kids and not getting to do something because we weren’t “old enough,” right? As if when a certain age hits, you are freed of the bonds of whatever was keeping you from a certain task or experience because of that age. So, in the context of this film, Mikey’s dad staying up to all hours trying to figure out a way for them and the other families living in the Goon Docks to remain in the face of foreclosure showed no results. It was the kids on this crazy ass adventure utilizing material that was already at the hands of the adults who overlooked it that saved the day. What is a more satisfying way to say “fuck you” (relatively speaking) to people who keep you from doing things just because of your age? Suck it, parents. That the kids were able to stick it to rich assholes in the same process is a double win.
4) Being a little brother sometimes is cooler than being the older one
Mikey (Sean Astin) is the driver of the story. It’s his decision, along with friends Mouth (pre-heroin Corey Feldman), Data (Ke Huy Quan) and Chunk (Jeff Cohen), that sets the whole series of events of the film in order. Despite being an asthmatic, Mikey frequently bests his more able-bodied, albeit screw-up of a big brother, Brandon (Josh Brolin), a win for all little brothers out there.
Brandon’s got no time for little kid shenanigans, thus they get the side-eye.
I have an older brother with whom I’ve always had a fantastic relationship never having but minimal problems with him throughout our lives. I suspect I’m in the minority there. However, that the little brother wins in this film never escaped me because it was always a pleasure to defeat the Golden Boy of our family when I did. No doubt he would say something about the rare occasion that it actually happened. Sure Brandon gets the girl in the end, but Mikey smooched her first AND found the treasure. To quote Charlie Sheen – WINNING.
3) The kids in this movie act like real kids and are relatable
You idiot, that’s my mom’s favorite part!
One of the things I had to watch with this movie was the fair amount of swearing in this movie. While my children have been subjected to these words before, usually when my crotchety ass father is around or when I’m driving, hearing other kids relatively close in age to them is different. But in this movie, the filmmakers didn’t give us the standard white-washed, idealized Disney version of childhood where kids talk and act more like Beaver Cleaver, submissive and obedient, than Chunk Or Mouth. The kids in this movie speak like kids did when I was growing up, especially when out of earshot of their parents. That they disobey and are skeptical of as well as speak in ways that mimic their parents rings is honest, even to a 10-year old watching in a theater in 1985.
Another key to these kids is that they very relatable in the sense that it’s likely that we had similar examples in our own friend groups as kids. There were certainly cheeky kids who resembled Mouth in their own Eddie Haskell-ish ways – sweet to our moms, but loudmouth troublemakers.
Mrs. Walsh, I speak perfect Spanish and if it’s any help to you, I’d be glad to communicate with Rosalita.
Everyone knew the pathological liar, perhaps even keeping them around to see what sheer nonsense they would make up next. And we all had friends with crazy ass ideas and the ability to get us all in trouble. These archetypes are fairly universal and the filmmakers employed them with great execution.
2) Friendship trumps all
As a kid, the one thing that is more important than anything else outside of your parents is your friends. They give you affirmation that you belong to something, a group, and give you some sort of identity. They are your sounding boards, your shoulders to cry on, your hecklers, your champions. In short, they are a separate, but equal family. I know this was and is the case for me still. And The Goonies represent this to the fullest. All of them are in the same situation – facing foreclosure and the threat that they will all be separated. So what do they do? One last adventure together, one last chance to stick their necks out for one another, laying it all on the line in the hopes that they can somehow make it so this assumed separation will not happen by getting each others’ backs.
The whole gang, still together after their battle with The Fratellis and meeting One-Eyed Willie.
My friends and I had a series of Cardinal Rules and the overarching rule that superseded all was Don’t Break the Team, meaning never sell out your friends. Pretty solid lesson to learn as a kid, methinks. The Goonies has this in spades.
1) Promise of adventure
Perhaps this is the one thing that we lose as we transition into adulthood and settle into the humdrum of our professional and family lives. Growing more content with our bevy of technology making everyday tasks easier by the day, we don’t capitalize on our newly acquired time. We instead are content to keep our eyes pasted to the multitude of screens that surround us, mostly our smartphones. This movie really captures the lifeblood that is youth – each day brings a new adventure and it reminds us to perhaps exploit that as much as we can.
Do you think there’s rich stuff for us?
I put watching this film with my boys very high on my list of my favorite film-related experiences of all-time, because I literally felt I was sharing my childhood with them and they embraced it. Now we have that in common. I could see in them the same excitement that I had in watching The Goonies when it first came out. What’s more exciting to kids like mine at their age than looking for and finding pirate treasure? In fact, what more exciting to adults like me than finding pirate treasure? Not really anything. So it’s no wonder that this film still has relevance 28 years after it was released and will likely continue to do so for years to come. This is the wonderful thing about film – how the story and themes contained within a short 1-3 hour window can literally transcend time and era.
Goonies 25th Reunion
For you unfortunate souls who have never seen this classic, here’s the trailer:
And let’s not forget the awesome Cyndi Lauper video for the theme song: